Starbucks in Chicago

PC was a no show in today's Mac v. PC cafe cage fight. Of course, mine was the only Mac in the room but a score of 1 to 0 means that Mac won by an infinite margin.

Running Total: 8 Macs, 2 PC's.

Yeah, yeah, yeah...I know, you expected a review of some trendy neighborhood cafe and here I am at the corporate giant. But in my defense, I did live in Seattle for the last 5 years. So that means it's sort of like my hometown coffee shop. Well, there's that and the fact I had a $20 gift certificate to Starbucks and I'm without much income at the moment (starting a new business has a tendency to do that to a person).

For those of you that don't follow corporate news, Starbucks is really struggling right now and I figured out a couple of reasons why. First and foremost, their barista's. For better or worse, if you want to bring people into your store, hire the hottest people you can find. What I saw at this Starbucks was a 60 year-old man, a pudgy 20ish girl, and a pimply faced college student. Seriously, just hire some leggy blond and put her in one of those sexy Starbucks aprons.

Secondly, they don't have any internet! Okay, that's not true, they do have internet but you have to pay for it! So you don't see any college students or solo entrepreneur's in their working. Instead, you have a bunch of stay-at-home mom's chatting to each other or old, retired men reading the paper. Not exactly a growing demographic in today's economic environment.

Third, I feel like I'm an extra in a Stepford Wives movie every time I walk into a Starbucks. They all have that same cheesy, I want to be trendy look about them. It's kind of like walking into your typically American Irish Pub that has so much "Irish" crap on the walls that epileptics have to be careful to not go into a seizure when they order a pint. If you really want an idea of what a neighborhood cafe is like, check out The Grind or the Chocolati Cafe in Seattle's Wallingford neighborhood. Both of those are cool places because they don't try too hard to be hip.

However, for all their problems, I will say that they easily have the best coffee around. I'm always amazed when I go into a Starbucks at how good their coffee is. And if I ever do want to order some fluffy drink, like a tall, skim, vanilla latte, I know that Starbucks will make the best one in town.

So hate 'em because they're a corporate giant. Hate 'em because their decor makes you feel like you're an extra in the Stepford Wives. Hate 'em because they hire ugly baristas. Hate 'em because they try to make you pay for internet. But you've got to love how great their coffee is.

Atmosphere: 2, Price: 3, Coffee: 5, Overall: 3 (0-5 point scale)